41

Borrowing

A friend of a man will be permitted to borrow any item of a fellow man’s under certain condtions.

  • The borrower has given 24-hour notice if the item is used on a daily basis by the owner.
  • The borrower has given 12-hour notice if the item is used occasionally by the owner.
  • The borrower may ask for immediate lending if the item is rarely used by the owner.

The item may be refused for lending only if any of the following conditions are met;

  • The item has intrinsic value as a family heirloom or keepsake.
  • The item is extremely delicate.
  • The item cannot be operated without certain training (this doesn’t apply to tools as any man has inherited skill as a craftsmen).
  • The item is a wife or girlfriend, which likely makes the former three conditions apply.
134

Secrecy

A man must claim ignorance on the whereabouts of the fellow man when asked by his wife, girlfriend or significant other.

This law is intrinsic and automatically applies without having to be asked.

Notable exceptions:

  • A man may divulge a fellow man’s whereabouts in extraordinary situations including: natural disasters, personal emergencies, police intervention, etc.
  • This rule is null and void if the fellow man is in considerable debt to the man under question: this includes significant monetary or beer debt. However, this exception only is applicable once per debt, and cannot be used again until the fellow man as accrued another debt.

Violation of a man’s trust requires a tier 4 penalty for first offense, but a more severe penalty may be required if significant repercussions occur by the divulging of information.

85

Gifts for the Fellow Man

Some other man code dictates that the giving of birthday or other gifts is unmanly.

This code declares that gift-giving is acceptable providing that the gift is manly.

Manly gift ideas include boxes of cigars, chainsaws, pet tigers and drag racers.

41

Brand Logos

A man may not be seen with more than one clothing brand logo without endorsement.

This includes the logos of Nike, Hollister, AE, Airwalk, Adidas, etc.

This applies to clothing brands only, you are encouraged to display signs of your favorite beer or sports team whenever possible.

50

The Shoe Rule

It is punishable to ’shame’ someone who has passed out at a party, but only if their shoes are off.

If a man passes out with his shoes on, he has incorrectly factored the delicate balance of his sleep requirements, alcohol tolerance, and testicular fortitude. He is open to all forms of shaming – points added for creativity.

399

A Friend’s Ex

A friend’s ex girlfriend is off limits unless any of the following conditions are met:

  • Verbal consent of the friend, witnessed by at least one other man.
  • The girl in question was involved with you prior to her interaction with the friend.
  • The friend has knowingly engaged in the pursuit of a woman you were interested in (retribution clause).

A man’s ex wife is completely off limits, punishable up to tier 7.

51

Man Hug

A man hug must meet the following conditions:

  • Only one arm behind the back may be used.
  • No more than 3 pats.
  • No facial contact (preferably at least 3 inches of separation).
  • No lingering.
  • ABSOLUTELY no contented sighs.
59

Sleeping Accomodations

Men who are forced to occupy close living quarters should not occupy the same bed. In all situations, the floor should be preferred.

However, if it becomes infeasible to do so, wearing sweat pants or other fully-covering garment of clothing is necessary.

48

Road Trip Gasoline Expenses

Gasoline costs shall be split evenly among those participating. The vehicle’s owner may be allowed to pass on a single contribution to the fuel fund in exchange for the use of his vehicle, but this must be agreed upon in advance.

114

Steak

Points to remember about steak.

  • Minimum of 8 ounces to be considered manly.
  • Must be barbecued.
  • There are no leftovers.
  • Eating gristle makes you manlier.
 

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